Empowering Dating Advice for Women
Confidently Authentic was created to provide dating advice for women which is both effective and empowering. The guiding philosophy here at Confidently Authentic is you don’t have to work so hard to attract and maintain a truly satisfying and healthy relationship. The dating process doesn’t need to be so anxiety-inducing, confusing, disappointing, or frustrating.
Confidently Authentic is the site I wish I had when I was struggling in my dating life for almost two decades! When I would search online, there was an absence of empowering articles on dating. Instead, I’d find myself in a loop in which the guy apparently had all the control and options. I would see quizzes and listicles to assess if “he likes you” and ways to get “him” to commit. This information reinforced the idea that I just needed to try harder.
Of course, this was hurtful because the reality was – and is – some people have the capability and desire to be a healthy, committed partner and some people just don’t. Here, at Confidently Authentic, the dating advice you will receive is designed to care and nurture you. We are passionate about combatting the pervasive cultural messages that as a woman your primary concerns should be how attractive and desirable you are, what your male partner’s needs are, and finding commitment.
Your authentic self is already worthwhile and lovable. Some people you meet won’t be able to appreciate this but that’s ok. Here, you will learn how to listen, and trust yourself, leading you to stop second-guessing yourself. You will learn how to truly love yourself and stop equating someone’s interest in you with your worth! No more obsessing about the fact you were left on read or “what he meant when he said…“!
A part of you may believe that you need to find someone else to be happy or whole. This is understandable as these messages about “your other half” are everywhere. Yet, you are already whole. As you heal the parts of you that may have forgotten this, you lay the foundation for your authentic dream life which includes finding the right person for you (and never settling).
Every week, two articles are posted. One on a general topic, related to personal development, healing problematic relationship patterns, as well as self-awareness. On the surface, these articles may not seem like dating advice yet they are. After all, you can only love another person to the degree to which you love yourself. Additionally, each week features a dating advice column for women called “Consult with Krystal” since I have been a relationship therapist for over a decade. Your questions about dating or relationships are always welcome. You may DM us on Instagram your questions or send us an email.
Relationship therapist & author
Krystal Mazzola Wood is a licensed marriage and family therapist. For over a decade, she has helped clients heal their relationships with others and themselves. She currently sees clients at her private practice, The Healthy Relationship Foundation. Her clinical experience and expertise led her to write her two best-selling books, The Codependency Recovery Plan: A 5 Step Guide to Understand, Accept and Break Free from the Codependent Cycle and The Codependency Workbook: Simple Practices for Developing and Maintaining Your Independence. To support more people in their relationships, she also developed a 4-part healthy boundaries system which is featured in her course, Confidently Authentic: Stop People Pleasing and Start Being True to Yourself. Her third book, Self-Love Made Possible, will be released Fall 2022.
11years as a relationship therapist
2Best-Selling Relationship books, The Codependency Recovery Plan & The COdependency workbook
1Course for improved confidence & relationships
My Personal Journey
I struggled for almost two decades in my dating life. I was the queen of the situationship as well as on-again, off-again relationships. Dating was incredibly hard for me because I didn’t know what I wanted. Instead, I sought validation from emotionally unavailable men to “prove my worth.”
Yet, as an avid learner (& relationship expert!), I knew it was possible to break these patterns of low self-esteem, people-pleasing, insecurity, and codependency. I realized my worth needed to no longer be dependent on romantic or sexual attention. Knowing this, I began to heal my relationship with myself.
Over time, as I became confidently authentic, everything changed. My sense of self-worth came from inside of me. I stopped believing another person would make me whole or happy. I knew that even if a romantic partnership was never mine my life still mattered!
Yet, I still truly wanted to find “my person” to experience the adventure of life-long intimacy. Therefore, I dated in a completely new way – one rooted in self-worth and self-protection. I became honest with myself about what I genuinely wanted instead of what was “cool.” I stopped ignoring red flags. I stopped choosing to experience hurt just to have a good “story.” I started to really listen to myself and trust myself. I stopped feeling “guilty” and obligated to spend my time with someone and started setting genuine boundaries. I stopped self-sabotaging.
Dating in this new way where I focused on self-love first did lead to ultimate external success though as well. Eventually, I did find my husband who is the partner I always dreamt of. But this only happened because I healed my relationship with myself first.